Joy

It’s difficult to choose a favorite Mary Oliver poem but this morning I’m reminded of one which is in the top 10 of best loved and it is “Don’t Hesitate.” Thinking back, I may have mentioned this one before. It begins “If you suddenly and unexpectedly feel joy don’t hesitate.” Does this sound familiar?

It’s one of those mornings when at 6am, the temperature is 71 degrees F. with 88% humidity and the sun is shining after yesterday’s remnants of a hurricane blew the trees this way and that as rain came down every which way. During this time the scheduled power-washing of the buildings in my community was going on so to say there was a lot of water is an understatement. From inside I watched the young man going about his work seemingly without a care in the world. In fact, he appeared to be enjoying himself out there, drenched to the bone. There’s a lesson in that.

Life continually offers up lessons for us, opportunities to re-experience emotions, to open to the nowness in front of us. If you are like me, you need to be reminded to drop all expectations and allow your discursive mind to rest as you take moments, seconds to allow your senses to see, hear, taste or feel what is in front of you.

How many times have we heard the words of those wiser than we reminding us of the truth of this. Actually I ‘ll rephrase that; people are wise sometimes/often/seldom. None of us are wise all of the time. That power washer guy was wiser than I in that moment because he was doing what he needed to do despite the weather while I was inside having spent too much time trying to figure out when to take my old dog out and not end up with two beings dripping wet. The storm didn’t end until well after midnight so we did go out, did get wet right down to and including underwear (I did, Coco was so wet I could see his skin beneath the curls.) Coming back in, you know what dogs do…shake, roll, rub against furniture and start running around. But it was ok. I had had a ‘reset’, an attitude adjustment in the lesson from the washer-man. Will I ‘stay that way’? Of course not but at least for a bit, before returning to the default mode of meandering inside my head. It’s like being at a banquet preoccupied with past meals, thoughts of how many calories this will add up to, how much exercise will need to be done to gain an edge, blah, blah, blah…while the food on your plate is getting cold.

Speaking of plates, later this morning I’ll make a trip to the Co-op’s produce department. I know what I’ll be seeing: baskets of local tomatoes of every variety grown in this valley, shiny eggplants, kale in shades of green, corn for husking and hurray, there is a barrel so that job can be done right on the spot, green and yellow string beans, fat red, yellow, orange and green peppers, fresh herbs, zucchini not too big, yellow squash, melons piled up so artfully, local stone fruit, small boxes of blueberries which may or may not be sweet because this year it’s been iffy and on and on. I’ll have to keep moving because it’s Saturday when those who work during the week are trying to get their shopping done. On second thought, maybe I’ll go in the early evening when I can shop at a slower pace and really look. Yes, that’s a plan.

It’s time to wipe off the chairs on the deck, crank open the umbrella and sit among the juvenile woodpeckers who still are pretty fearless around me as I drink my coffee.

Here are some quotes which I hope you will enjoy.

“We are living in a culture entirely hypnotized by the illusion of time, in which the so-called present moment is felt as nothing but an infinitesimal hairline between an all-powerfully causative past and an absorbingly important future. We have no present. Our consciousness is almost completely preoccupied with memory and expectation. We do not realize that there never was, is, nor will be any other experience than present experience. We are therefore out of touch with reality. We confuse the world as talked about, described, and measured with the world which actually is. We are sick with a fascination for the useful tools of names and numbers, of symbols, signs, conceptions and ideas.” Alan Watts

“There is only one time that is important – NOW!! It is the most important time because it is the only time that we have any power.” Leo Tolstoy

“Joy and life exist nowhere but the present.” Maxine Hong Kingston

Don’t Hesitate

by Mary Oliver

“If you suddenly and unexpectedly feel joy,
don’t hesitate. Give in to it. There are plenty
of lives and whole towns destroyed or about
to be. We are not wise, and not very often
kind. And much can never be redeemed.
Still, life has some possibility left. Perhaps this
is its way of fighting back, that sometimes
something happens better than all the riches
or power in the world. It could be anything,
but very likely you notice it in the instant
when love begins. Anyway, that’s often the
case. Anyway, whatever it is, don’t be afraid
of its plenty. Joy is not made to be a crumb.”